So I've established that Sukkot in Kalisz was a wonderfully anointed time. As a result I need many posts to do justice to describing my time there. During the week I received various words and messages from God, and more or less I've decided to give each one a post, describing situations as needed.
This is in all likelihood an incredibly boring post idea for anyone other than me, spiritual mentors (though not even that's certain), and my mom (again, not so sure on that one...). All the same, sometimes it's nice to see the parallel ways God moves in our lives. Sometimes in my story there's a blessing for you in yours, and vice versa. So here we go!
The first word I received from God was from a member of one of the English worship teams (some countries had more than one team). I was sitting near the back of the sanctuary, asking God to hear from Him. I've struggled so much with pride that I fear that sometimes I go too far, focusing more on abasing myself in my sin rather than accepting God's grace and praising Him for covering it. Some would describe that as false humility, since I end up being the focus just the same. At any rate, despite my self preoccupation, God still saw fit to give me a word of encouragement. Here is what He had for me: You are more than a conqueror. It's time to spread your wings and fly.
Now that I am agonizing over next steps this word seems all the more pertinent. All of the doubts and reservations holding me back from going into full time missions sooner rather than later have no bearing before the All Powerful and Able to Provide Anything God. I am more than a conqueror in Christ, and so really, through the power of His spirit I actually can spread my wings and fly. You see, if I really believe that our God is greater then I must also believe that He can take care of student loan debt and any living costs that arise as I move into the ministry work He has prepared for me.
If I believe that whatever next step I take is walking into God's will, then I trust that He will provide for me every step of the way, and that He will also provide for my family and friends. I trust that my mother will be understanding and that my family and friends and I will remain close in heart. And in any case that arises, I trust that God's grace is and will be sufficient unto my needs.